#3 WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOUR ANIMAL COMPANION DOESN’T WANT TO BE TOUCHED?
This is a question I’m asked quite often.... and it definitely came up in the last couple of weeks in the group. And the answer is wonderfully simple:
DON’T TOUCH THEM!
There are so many ways we can connect with and support our animal companions without putting our hands on them.
In fact, sometimes less is more.
Animals are wonderfully sensitive to energy, intention, body language and our emotional state. Sometimes the kindest thing we can do is simply give them space and allow them to come to us when they are ready.
So, if your dog moves away when you reach out, your cat disappears under the bed, or your horse turns his back and says, rather emphatically, “Not today thank you!” — listen to them.
There are plenty of other roads up the mountain.
START WITH YOU
Before doing anything, ground yourself.
Feel your feet on the earth. Breathe. Become still.
You can imagine little roots growing down from the soles of your feet, deep into Mother Earth, allowing anything tired, stale or stressful to drain downwards.
Then breathe and settle.
Your animal is going to notice your energy before you even begin.
If you are rushing, worried, distracted or desperate for something to happen, your animal will probably know it. Do you perhaps have something going on in your life that is impacting your health and well-being and your animal companion is 'mirroring' it back to you in an attempt to get you to consider making a change, relieving stress, taking a break, looking after yourself.
So come back to yourself first.
As I say in my books, sometimes you, and your love, can be your animal’s very best medicine.
And remember: you are not there to “heal” your animal. You are simply creating the conditions in which their own self-healing wisdom can be supported.
SIT BESIDE THE FIELD
This is one of my favourite things to do with horses, but there is no reason you can't adapt it for a dog, cat or any other animal.
Go and sit quietly nearby.
You don't have to approach them.
You don't have to call them.
You don't even have to look at them constantly.
Just be there.
Breathe.
Listen to the sounds around you.
Feel the earth beneath you.
Let your eyes soften.
And observe.
What is your animal doing when nobody is asking anything of them?
How do they move?
Where do they choose to stand?
Who or what do they look towards?
Do they come closer?
Do they move away?
This quiet observation can tell you an enormous amount.
One of the things I love about working with animals is that they will often tell us what they need — if we stop trying to make them do what we want.
Stillness is the secret.
CONNECT HEART TO HEART — WITHOUT TOUCHING
Here's another favourite.
Sit comfortably, ground yourself and bring your attention into your own heart.
Imagine your animal's heart chakra in front of you.
Then, very gently, Figure 8 between your heart and theirs.
You don't need to touch them.
You don't even need to be close.
Just imagine the Figure 8 weaving between your two hearts.
Don't force it.
Don't try to make anything happen.
Simply allow the connection.
You might silently say:
“I love you.I am here.You are safe.There is nothing you need to do.”
And then… stop.
Let the animal decide what happens next.
Sometimes they will come towards you.
Sometimes they will stay exactly where they are.
Both are perfectly okay.
WORK IN THE BIOFIELD
If your animal doesn't want physical touch, simply move your hands into the energy field around them.
You might be several inches away — or much further.
There is no magic measurement.
Experiment.
You can make slow circles, Figure 8s or simply hold your hands still.
With horses, I particularly love working from the side of the field, creating what I call an Auric Cocoon.
Imagine gently weaving threads of energy around your animal, loosely creating a soft energetic web — not tight, not restrictive, simply a space of safety and stability.
You are not grabbing their energy.
You are not imposing anything.
You are simply offering.
And then observe.
If your animal relaxes, softens, sighs, blinks, lowers their head, stretches, yawns or simply becomes quieter, that's information.
If they move away?
That's information too.
Listen.
TRY FIGURE 8s
Figure 8s are one of my favourite tools because they encourage connection and movement without requiring physical contact.
You can Figure 8:
between the heart chakras
around an area that feels energetically congested
between two chakras — they don't have to be next to each other.
gently around the animal's whole biofield or
simply in the air while holding your loving intention
With horses, I often work Figure 8s down the back in the energy field, rather than on the body.
The Figure 8 has this lovely quality of encouraging two things to communicate with each other rather than treating them as separate.
Here's a link about 8's: https://www.madisonking.com/post/how-to-do-a-figure-8
YOUR BREATH CAN BECOME THE MEDICINE
You can also simply sit with your animal and breathe.
Slowly.
Quietly.
Don't make the breathing dramatic.
Just soften your exhale.
Imagine that with every out-breath you are releasing tension from your own body and creating a bigger bubble of calm around you.
Animals are extraordinarily sensitive to our nervous systems.
Sometimes the most powerful thing you can give them is a calmer version of yourself.
USE SOUND
Some animals respond beautifully to sound.
Your voice. tittle tattle with love
A gentle song.
A soft hum.
Even repeating a single word such as:
LOVE
CALM
SAFE
HEALING
You don't have to chant or perform.
Just allow the sound to carry your intention.
And, as always, watch your animal.
If they soften, continue.
If they become irritated and walk away…
Well, there's your answer!
COLOUR CAN BE FUN TOO
Colour carries vibration, so why not experiment?
You can sit quietly with your animal and imagine a colour surrounding them.
Or simply place a coloured cloth or object nearby and see what they are drawn towards.
You can even dowse or energy test colours if that's part of your practice.
I love this sort of thing because there is no need to make it complicated.
Observe. Be curious. Experiment.
Your animal will be your guide.
Click on this link for a blog I did on using colour: https://www.madisonking.com/post/self-healing-with-colour
AND THEN THERE IS DISTANCE HEALING…
This is where my original “Lazy Way to Distance Heal” blog comes in. Click on this link:
You don't actually have to be in the same room.
You can use a photograph as your “witness”, set your intention, and work from love, light and healing for the animal's highest good.
You can introduce whatever you feel will support that intention — perhaps a crystal, flower essence, colour, written affirmation or simply your loving thought.
You can even write something as simple as:
“I support the self-healing of [animal's name] in the way that is right for them.”
Then let it go.
No forcing.
No worrying.
No checking every five minutes to see whether anything has happened!
Just trust the process.
THE DIVINE HEALING CODES are worth exploring: click on this link for my blog on the subject:
MOST IMPORTANTLY…
Remember the energetic etiquette:
Tell your animal what you are doing.
Ask permission.
And listen to their answer.
Permission doesn't always come as a dramatic “yes”.
Sometimes it is a softening of the body.
A deeper breath.
A turning towards you.
A relaxed eye.
A quiet staying.
And sometimes the answer is:
“No thank you.”
That's okay.
Respecting that “no” is itself an act of love.
Animals don't have to be touched for us to connect with them.
They don't have to cooperate.
They don't have to lie still while we “do” something to them.
Sometimes we simply sit beside them.
Sometimes we ground.
Sometimes we breathe.
Sometimes we Figure 8 between hearts.
Sometimes we work in their biofield.
Sometimes we send love from across the room.
And sometimes…
we do absolutely nothing.
We simply sit quietly and enjoy being together.
Because perhaps the greatest gift of Energy Medicine for Animals is not learning how to do more to our animals.
Perhaps it is learning how to listen better.
Be open-minded. Be creative. Work from the heart. And let your animal be your guide.
Here is another blog I wrote some time ago that may interest you on this subject of not wanting to be touched: https://www.madisonking.com/post/what-if-your-animal-companion-doesn-t-want-to-be-touched
With love,
Maddie
As always, Energy Medicine is intended as a complementary approach and does not replace veterinary care. If you are concerned about a change in your animal's behaviour, health or wellbeing, please consult your vet.
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