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What if your animal companion doesn't want to be touched?



So much can be achieved with a loving touch, be it with your horse, dog or cat. And it is as natural as breathing to stroke and connect through touching your animal companion. BUT ....

what happens if he/she doesn't enjoy touch, is suspicious or even fearful of it, as often happens with rescue animals. How can you overcome this so that he/she can enjoy those loving touches?


Here are my favourite non-intrusive tips to help you solve this problem:


DON'T TOUCH! keep your distance and connect instead with your voice, calming 'tittle tattle' such as "you are safe, you are loved" carry a vibrational charge that can initiate the beginning of a connection, first with you and your family and eventually with others.


BODY LANGUAGE - make sure it's not threatening in any way, no quick movements, raised arms/hands etc., this will apply as you introduce other 2-leggeds.


THE AURA - is a good place to start. Stand well away and while you 'tittle tattle' connect, as much as you can, from a distance, very slowly stroking the aura in whatever way your 'intuition' guides you; stroke, circle, all in the biofield.

Your animal will sense it. You then need to follow his/her lead and maybe he/she walks away, let him (let's go masculine now and feminine for the next blog!) leave. Animals respond very quickly to this type of work and sometimes a few seconds or a minute is enough. Don't force it in any way, don't be disappointed and next time he'll let you do it for a little longer, and so you will build it up, until he's very comfortable with you working in the aura.

Of course, the beauty of working in the aura, strengthening it, gives an energetic confidence that will begin to impact the emotional and the physical .... it's a perfect start point. A gentle way, that may take time but ultimately make him feel comfortable and safe with touch itself.


THE HEART - sit quietly away from the animal and get yourself balanced and grounded. Perhaps I should have put this first, because by osmosis you will be impacting your animal, the more balanced and relaxed you are, the more it will balance your animal companion, the more he will begin to feel safe with you and with that safety comes trust in you, then those around you and ultimately with strangers.


Perhaps match your breathing to his, slowing it down gradually.


Trace a heart over your heart area. Place your hands in front of your heart, palms facing him and gently trace a heart over his heart area - repeating the words love and safety. At first this may be done from a distance. Heart energy on humans and animals emanates out widely from the body and can therefore be a good place to connect, especially with an animal being introduced to your home, be it from a loving 'breeder' or a rescue home. They need to feel safe, they have to trust you.


If you work with crystals, tracing a heart with a Rose Quartz or Selenite adds a very gentle healing energy.


FIGURE 8's after the hearts, trace a figure 8 between your heart and his - again, repeating the words love, safety and whatever you feel he'll respond to - the vibration will be absorbed by him and the 8, a Tibetan symbol of healing and infinity, will work it's magic!


FLOWER ESSENCES if you work with essences dowse or test to see which is appropriate. If not my suggestions would be:

  1. Flannel Flower to feel comfortable with touch (Bach/Healing Herbs)

  2. Mimulus for fearfulness (Bach/Healing Herbs)

  3. Rock Rose for terror (Bach/Healing Herbs)

  4. Dog Rose when fearful, shy or timid (Bach/Healing Herbs)

  5. Rescue Remedy (Bach/Healing Herbs)

  6. Emergency Essence (Australian Bush Flower Essence)

  7. Green Spider Orchid (Australian Bush Flower Essence) encourages non-verbal communication between you and your animal - both of you take it


How to use them:-


There are many brands on the market now but my top two are ‘Healing Herbs’ (Bach) and Ian White’s Australian Bush Flower Essences. Explore the options available near you or make your own.


Why do I adore them? Because they are gentle, non-intrusive and excellent when working with trapped emotions that can cause physical or behavioural problems such as issues with touch and socialising.


I also find them useful ‘guides’ they offer another layer of information. Each gives you a clue as to the underlying emotions you need to work with. They bring them to the fore, so you are aware of them and can therefore work with them.


If you have a ‘stock’ bottle, this should be diluted in mineral water (see the recommended dose) I always test to see the optimum dose to use – often it's 7 drops in 30ml, you can mix 3-4 essences, but if you are starting, keep to 1-2. For humans we add a few drops of brandy in the mix to stabilise it. However, animals might be put off by the smell of the brandy. Instead make smaller quantities and use more quickly.

You can add some drops (say 7) in his drinking water but my favourite way is to rub a few drops in my hands, rub them together and work the aura as described above, with a relevant affirmation.


Emotions can often stack in layers, and you will work with each layer as it reveals itself, so this is something that you may do daily for a few days.


And a thought: YOU take them as well - remember, sometimes animals mirror something within us but at the very least if you are balanced around the emotional issue that osmosis will come into play. It's a nuance, but it can help.

I always use a positive statement relevant to the flower essence when I work with them.


Another nuance is to introduce your hand for physical touch with your little finger .... it's non threatening and carries the energy of the Heart meridian, which is the most loving and safest energy of the body that he may sense.


Work out where he might be the most accepting of touch by you, or people visiting you (and make sure they know). Merlin, for example, is anybody's if they scratch / stroke his chest or base of his tail.


The ultimate calming touch enjoyed by dogs especially is what I call the 'mummy lick', it imitates the mother's licking straight after birth and can be deeply comforting. Stroke along the jaw/edge of mouth from nose to ear on both sides.


Touch is vital for your relationship with your animal companion. Humans thrive with loving touch and animals do too. Take time and patience to get to the point where your animal feels safe and trusts you and will accept without any doubt your touch and love. Then expand to include family and friends that visit.


Don't forget the power of reward and if your animal likes a particular 'treat', when they receive touch willingly, give huge praise and a treat.


Take time for loving touch every single day .... it will benefit you both!


PS - if your animal suddenly becomes adverse to touch in any way, check him over carefully, could there be a painful area that has emerged - a scratch, bite, wound or inflamed painful joint that does not respond well to being touched. It's sometimes not an emotional reason behind problems with touch, it can be physical.



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