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Breaking down a barrier to self-care


One of my personal 'self-care' enjoyments is to take time in the morning to sit in the garden (or my garden shed, its England so it's not always sunny!) and read or listen to something 'inspirational', or just enjoy the silence.

I was reading Rumi earlier today and while the 13th-century Persian poet and mystic, didn't explicitly use the term "self-care," his poetry often contains wisdom and insights that refer to love and what greater love can there be than to start by loving yourself?


No ..... I hear an intake of breath: that is NOT being selfish.


Loving and looking after yourself is what makes us stronger, calmer, healthier, more compassionate and present for those around us, either to actively support them or simply by osmosis and just 'being there' for them. Let go of that 'selfishness' label when used in reference to self-care, open up your mind to the infinite possibilities of what you can achieve, in all aspects of your life, if you are the best version of what you can be!


Sometimes it's saying 'no' to something you feel you 'should' do … what is that word 'should'? how many times a day do you use it? are you living your life by it? erase it from your daily vocabulary, it's not constructive, it's limiting.


I had a 'should moment' this morning: I thought I 'should' go to a meeting, miles away from where I live, they don't really need me, it would use up an entire morning of my time, wouldn't achieve much and would create time-stress for the rest of the day. I wasn't letting anyone down, I wouldn't really be missed .... I was purely in a classic 'should moment'!

What did I do?

Well, I'm sitting here writing this and then I'm taking the dogs for a longer walk in the beautiful English countryside.

I resisted the pull of should.


So today I invite you to also resist the pull of any 'should moment' that raises it's head! and this is the important thing ..... feel good and proud of doing so - it's a self care step towards a healthier you... it's breaking down a barrier to self-love


Here's a Rumi quote that touches on the theme of self-care:

"Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it."

This quote highlights the importance of looking within ourselves and addressing the internal barriers we may have constructed that inhibit our ability to love and care for ourselves. After all, nobody can do it for us, there are no self-care knights in shining armour, they may point you in the right direction, but YOU have to love yourself enough to look after yourself.


Self-care involves nurturing our emotional, mental, energetic and physical well-being, and this quote encourages us to be introspective and remove the obstacles that may be preventing us from fully experiencing love and compassion, both for ourselves and others.

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4 Comments


I CHOSE to read this, your blog, before exploring the notes from your insightful Tuesday evening Zoom meeting, DON'T LOSE SIGHT! or "IMPROVE YOUR VISION". I am looking for a hard copy of the pdf. Is that available, or will I find an online printer to hard copy it for me? I was inspired to work with meridian tracing & points in some of my energy work on Wednesday. I see myself using these insights. Typing that gave me an energy flow! Thank you Maddie. BEMore (not less!)

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Beautifully said

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Katherine Wheldon
Katherine Wheldon
Jul 22, 2023

Thank you Maddie for that timely reminder. I will try to look out for 'shoulds' from now on.

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Thank you, Maddie!! EXACTLY what I needed to hear in this moment!!

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